Inspiration-less

I have tried to write this blog post about 20 times, and each time I delete and start over.  So I'm just going to say it plain and simple:

I'm stressed.

The weekend began with 2 voicemails from my mother informing me that my 93-year old grandmother, and hero, was admitted to hospital and in the intensive care unit.  Needless to say, I ran out of work, went home to get my dog, some clean underwear, and a toothbrush, and drove home as fast as I dared.  The rest of the weekend was filled with heart monitors, oxygen levels, ordering food with no salt, and occasionally playing supervisor for my 91 year-old grandfather with dementia.  In total,  missed 3 classes and got very little school work done.  In short, I'm sleep deprived and screwed for my classes, and yet I still feel guilty that I left home to come back to school. 

As if school wasn't bad enough, I HATE my income tax class.  The professor has an attitude that I despise and I flat-out don't understand it.  So it takes me hours each week to do the reading and homework problems (I know...homework + law school = illegal)...and then I still have my other classes to worry about.  As of today, I still have not read one word for my international law class, and I think we're on page 300.  Oops.  That pretty much sums it up about school.

To add to school stress, I am supposed to spend every waking second looking for a job.  Considering that I sometimes do not have time to eat (but still am 10 lbs. overweight), I'm not sure how that's going to happen.  But each time I get my student loan statement, I am again reminded that I NEED A JOB.

I do have an internship that I love, and I really have no complaints other that it's been a big learning experience as I figure out how to balance school and work.  The only downside is that I'm the only law student enough to voluntarily work for free.  This does not help my other major stress-out factor...

MONEY.  Fixed income + mounting debt = Nuff said.

I have no clothes that fit because I apparently cannot stop putting carbs in my mouth.   Which makes my self esteem oh-so high!

Really, I could go on and on and on.  Admittedly, I am somewhat whining.  I do realize that everyone has similar problems.  I do.   And I realize that there are much larger issues in the world which are much more important than my measly existence.   But I just needed to put it out there that this is not one of my better weeks....

Here's looking forward to a bottle of wine and a better week next week!